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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23115337">As You Are</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cupilcopter/pseuds/Cupilcopter'>Cupilcopter</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Epithet Erased (Cartoon)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Comfort/Angst, Fluff, M/M, Self-Esteem Issues</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 16:16:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>787</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23115337</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cupilcopter/pseuds/Cupilcopter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Words are a powerful weapon, and Bugsy is hurt. </p><p>(( CW: Body image and self-esteem issues, though there is a positive overtone. ))</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Arnold Markdown/Bugsy Pugsler</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>As You Are</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This takes place before the show's timeline, when the guys are still just Captains, just in case my contextual abilities are lacking! Mild spoilers for EE in regards to characters' personal abilities or lack thereof.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bugsy tore through thick underbrush and stumbled into a clearing, his breath ragged. He hadn't been in a tussle like that in quite some time- he hadn't meant to get so overzealous, arguing with a fellow Banzai Blaster to the point of an all-out brawl, and Arnold's fervent protests from the sidelines as soon as it grew serious had pulled at his heartstrings. He knew how Arnold hated it when he got into scraps.</p><p>As he often did following these sorts of things, he'd stormed off, this time into the woods surrounding their temporary headquarters, waiting until he was a good enough distance away to start bolting. All he wanted was to get far enough away to drown out the laughter of his compatriots. Even though he hadn't lost- on the contrary; he'd hurled a few formidable attacks and knocked his opponent off his feet- it was his words that rang in his mind, words that drove the others who had gathered to watch into peals of laughter.</p><p>Today, the words had stung more than usual- somewhere, deep inside, a chord too many had been struck.</p><p>He sighed, slumping against a tree and sinking to the ground. He could feel the pressure of stinging tears threatening to spill over.</p><p><i>"Bugsy!"</i> Arnold's fleet footsteps crunched along behind him, drawing closer.</p><p>He began to dry his eyes frantically, attempting to right himself, but not quickly enough. Arnold popped into view, his face a mask of panic.</p><p>"Bugsy!!! There you are! Do you have ANY IDEA how worried I was?!"</p><p>"Yeah, sorry about that," Bugsy tried his best to sound nonchalant, but the tremble in his voice gave him away. "I got a bit turned around out here."</p><p>Arnold stopped just short of him. "Bugsy, are you alright?"</p><p>"I'm perfectly fine. Just resting. Stamina's running out after that... intense battle."</p><p>"Oh- oh, all right. Well. I'll rest with you." Arnold was quiet as he moved to sit beside him. Bugsy couldn't bear to meet his eyes, but in his peripheral vision he could see his partner's hands clasped across his knees patiently.</p><p> </p><p>"I'm tired of being like this," Bugsy said, breaking his silence after a time. His words felt heavy as he tried to stumble around them. He kept his eyes trained on the ground, though he could feel Arnold's stare. His partner's voice was quieter, gentle.</p><p>He felt a hand on his back. "Like what?"</p><p>Bugsy gestured at his middle, face growing hot as he did. "Like <i>THIS</i>. I thought I'd own it, you know, grow into it- use my size to strike fear into the hearts of my enemies." He tried to summon his best villain voice, but it faltered and cracked as his throat tightened again. "It's my epithet and it's all I've got. I can't help what it does to me."</p><p>He had heard it all, his whole life. Every possible insult you could imagine. Why this one had cut so deeply, he didn't understand. He heaved a miserable sigh. All of a sudden, there were arms around his shoulders, and a forehead pressing into his.</p><p>Arnold gingerly nuzzled against his face.</p><p>"You're perfect just as you are," he said.</p><p>Bugsy gulped back a sob. "You heard what he said. I'm a fat, ugly monster. That's all I'll ever be."</p><p>"Do you know what I'd give to be able to do what you can do? To hurl fire at people? Wield glacial powers? All I've got is paper." He took Bugsy's chin in his hand, meeting his eyes soberly. "Bugsy, you are incredible, and I won't have anyone making you feel like anything less." Arnold cupped his face, pressed their lips carefully together, and pulled back with a soft smile.</p><p>In all the years they'd known each other, Bugsy had never wanted to admit how much he wished he could be different, be something more. The Banzai Blasters had offered that, but even then, anyone other than their minions had treated him with the same disdain, whether to his face or behind his back, behind closed doors. The only one who hadn't, the one person who had been by his side through the thick of it since even before their dual promotion to Captains, sat before him, beaming at him proudly.</p><p>Unsure of what else to do, he returned his companion's embrace. "Thank you."</p><p>He could hear the smile in Arnold's voice as he nestled his face into his neck. "What are partners for, after all?"</p><p>"...You've got much more than just paper, you know," Bugsy replied.</p><p>"Of course I do. I've got you. Best deal I could've asked for."</p><p>After returning the earlier kiss in earnest, Bugsy let his partner help him to his feet.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This was the first snippet I ever wrote about these two, while I was still processing the way that Bugsy's weight was handled in the show. It's a complex subject for sure and I while I truly believe there was no ill intent, as all of the characters are meant to be very caricatured and over-the-top, I was sad to see that most of what we really saw of him was related to food and his size, since he's the main bigger-sized character, in that particular sense. As someone who's struggled with those sorts of issues and the related bullying, I wanted to write something where that issue was addressed a little, but also where Arnold was there to support him because I feel like that could certainly be one of their dynamics. </p><p>That being said, I got the feeling that Bugsy, by the time we see him in the show, has mastered his epithet and is proud of himself as he is- I'd like to imagine that having Arnold's support might have helped him along the way. Sure, he might be playing up how cool he feels like his powers are, as part of his act, but it'd be nice to believe he's happy, as a larger person. &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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